


Pining

by Mewjee77



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Rare Pairings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-13 01:48:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29145459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mewjee77/pseuds/Mewjee77
Summary: In which Ushijima and Oikawa both pine for each other. Somehow, they both end up heartbroken in the middle of a field.
Relationships: Oikawa Tooru/Ushijima Wakatoshi
Comments: 3
Kudos: 21





	1. Chapter 1

Ushijima has always been the resilient type, never giving up on something he really wanted and apparently that goes for people too.

When Ushijima saw Oikawa for the first time, it was like seeing color in his world. He saw someone so bright and cheerful, so hardworking and quite frankly, someone so beautiful it was obscene.

He didn't want to go anywhere near the man, he thought he'd just be pushed away. So when Oikawa was the first one to talk to him, he was at a loss for words.

"Ushijima Wakatoshi, right? You're like a really good spiker." Oikawa's eyes were gleaming with pure joy, as he outstretched his arm.

Ushijima thanked the gods as he shook Oikawa's hand.

Slowly but surely, over the course of two weeks, they became good friends. 

Then there was something that disrupted this friendly relationship, Ushijima's weird emotions.

When he was around Oikawa, it was as if the whole world stood still. He only focused on Oikawa. He was excited whenever he thought about the man, his heart skipped a beat every time Oikawa would take the ball out of his hands. 

It was strange. So naturally, Ushijima asked Tendou for advice.

Tendou was a bit shocked at the man's dilemma, even thinking he was joking; he wasn't.

He sat both of them down on Ushijima's bed, and asked him questions.

"Do you think about Oikawa as more than a friend?" Tendou asked, holding a notebook and a pen, ready to write.

"Yes?" Ushijima stated as Tendou began to write something down.

"Picture this. Oikawa has a girlfriend. How does that make your feel?"

"Bad." Ushijima answered, almost instantly as Tendou chuckled, writing something down again.

"Iwaizumi confesses to Oikawa, he rejects him. How'd you feel?" 

"Happy." Ushijima answered again, and Tendou just laughed, writing another letter in his notebook.

He flipped the notebook, showing the pages,

"Wakatoshi-kun's in lovee~"

Ushijima blushed at the paper, covering his face as Tendou shoved the notebook into his face.

"Toshii, you have to do something about itt~" 

"L-like what?" Ushijima said as Tendou let out a dramatic gasp.

"The Ushijima.. stuttering?!" Tendou said, acting out an Oscar worthy performance in the dorm.

Ushijima blushed again.

"Just go court him first or something Toshii~" Tendou said, plopping himself on the bed as Ushijima nodded.

A few days after that, Ushijima was always by Oikawa's side. Being there for him literally everywhere, following him like a lost puppy.

For a while, Oikawa seemed to like it. Him and Ushijima got closer every day that they spent together.

Ushijima started buying the man small gifts.

It was nothing big, just a water bottle, maybe the occasional chocolate bar here and there. Oikawa was grateful and thanked him every time he bought something.

Wakatoshi updated Tendou everyday, and each time Oikawa talked to him was the highlight of his day. His smile, no matter how little, was so beautiful. Oikawa's smile was stuck in Ushijima's mind, and he didn't care.

Ushijima finally found someone he liked. For years he thought he was going to remain single and end up being married to his volleyball career.

Ushijima was determined to make Oikawa like him back, and the voice in his head had hope.

He decided to finally confess to the man.

The next day while Oikawa was in one of his practice matches with Karasuno, Ushijima managed to sneak in. He put a gift bag on the bench with 'For Oikawa' scribbled on the front.

Oikawa seemed off today. He was so focused on the match. That wasn't unusual for Oikawa of course, but it was still weird for Ushijima to see. 

When the match ended and Karasuno won, Oikawa was visibly irritated. Throwing his water bottle when he finished drinking, and sitting down on the bench with a loud grunt.

When he finally saw the gift bag, he almost tore it open, quickly reading the letter inside.

He had a look of shock wash over his face before it immediately switched to annoyed.

He threw the gift bag in the nearest garbage bin, and walked away.

Ushijima felt his chest hurt at the sight, but his body and mind ignored it. He went to the meeting spot that was stated in the letter, and he waited.

And waited.

And waited some more.

The sky grew dark fast, and rain began to trickle down on his face. 

He couldn't, no, he didn't want to leave his spot. He trusted that Oikawa would be there for him, and much to his excitement, he saw the vague figure of the man coming closer towards him.

Oikawa reached out to Ushijima, letting him in under his umbrella.

"What's this about?" He said. He still seemed irritated, but Ushijima didn't really care much at this point.

Before he could say anything, Oikawa began to talk again.

"You know.. I don't get you. You always follow me like a creep, and now you ask to meet up in the middle of a field?" 

"I know it's weird but-"

"No. I've had enough. You know, I just wanted to be nice to you, but this is too far for me. I don't like you, Ushijima. I never fucking will," Oikawa said as he glared at the man, "The farther you are away from me, the happier the man I'll be."

Oikawa walked away, leaving Ushijima in his dust.

Ushijima felt his heart tug at his chest, his head felt dizzy and the rain wasn't really helping either.

Was it something he had done?

Maybe he should've tried harder?

He knew Oikawa was a hard man to impress, but he thought he could do it. He thought he'd get the Tooru Oikawa to like him back. Maybe Ushijima was foolish, maybe he was brave but that didn't really matter right now.

He was on his knees, in the middle of a field, in the rain, sobbing his eyes out because the man rejected him.

For the first time in a long time, Ushijima felt confused. He felt heartbroken, yet relieved?

Maybe he knew he would get rejected, and was happy to get it over with. But the voice in his head was devastated.

The voice that had hope. Hope that he would win over Oikawa's heart. That voice was shattered.

Just by two sentences.

And Ushijima felt stupid. His tear stricken face was choking on his own sobs and the rain began to pour even harder.

He felt so fucking stupid.

Oikawa was wanted and liked by so many women, and yet he thought he'd get him to like him back? 

He had so many options, so many choices and Ushijima was not even in there.

He was never considered. He wasn't even an option to begin with.

He got up, and ringed Tendou.

"Yess? How'd it go with Oikawa? You guys dating now?"

He felt his chest tighten even more.

"Tendou, I'm feeling.. stupid. Please come save me."

"I'll be over. Send me your location, yeah? Stay calm."

Ushijima hung up. He tried to stay calm, just like Tendou said, but this time he couldn't follow Tendou's advice.

His chest began to tighten even more, his tears and sobs began to be more intense. He was struggling to breathe. 

He tried. He tried so hard. He worked so hard so Oikawa could like him back.

He wanted so badly to treat Oikawa right, to spoil him, to love him.

Was it his fault Oikawa couldn't reciprocate his feelings?

When Tendou finally arrived, he saw his best friend broken on the ground. 

Tendou had never seen Ushijima so hurt. In fact, he doesn't even recall Ushijima ever crying.

He tried his best to calm the taller man down, and to some extent it worked, he brought Ushijima to his car and drove off.

The car was filled with loud silence, and Tendou decided to break it,

"Maybe.. you shouldn't talk to him. If he doesn't like you, it's his loss. Don't feel bad about it, Toshi."

Ushijima could only nod, the coldness of the car and his broken self made the perfect sleeping atmosphere.

He slept in the back seat of Tendou's now wet car, and Tendou just laughed.

"I hope Terushima doesn't mind me missing a date."

——  
End Of Chapter 1.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oikawa's side. (Also so sorry for the late update I thought I already posted it😭)

When you have all women at your fingertips you never really know what true love is. The rush and high of actually being in love with someone, and chasing them to the end of the earth while they smile at you.

Oikawa never felt love. He never wanted to. He thought that if he ever felt it, he would become unfocused and lose his will to play.

So for years, he turned down each and every person that came to him to confess their love. Until of course, he was the one to fall in love.

Ushijima Wakatoshi. One of the best highschool volleyball players, he was Oikawa's type to a T.

Every time this man talked, it felt like the world was collapsing. Every time he blushed, every time he did that thing with his fingers when he was nervous, Oikawa was over the moon.

He liked him needless to say, a little too much. He played all his games for Ushijima, winning it all just to be with him and boast about it. Iwaizumi encouraged it of course, after all he was more focused than he ever was before plus, he had a new thing to tease about.

Oikawa was growing more and more in love everyday, and Ushijima was always the recipient. He ate all the chocolate bars he bought, he treasured each water bottle, and loved it when their hands brushed against each other.

As Iwaizumi would say, "Love makes you a fucking creep." 

These past few weeks, his entire life was lit up by Ushijima's face and he loved it.

He began to think, what would he do if he liked him back? He doesn't have much of a reference of being rejected, he was always the one doing the rejecting. 

He was the one being confessed to, and he never experienced it the other way around. So he asked Kunimi for help.

"What the fuck? You think I get rejected a lot?" Kunimi asked the setter as he shifted in his seat.

"What? No of course not, I just couldn't ask anyone else. You don't really like talking so I just thought-" 

"Yeah yeah whatever. I would just say don't confess." 

Oikawa's face scrunched up in confusion, "Why not?"

"I mean, there's a big chance you're just gonna get rejected man." Kunimi stated, "But I know you like him a lot. Just go do it, but don't blame me if he has a wife or something." Kunimi added as he laughed a little bit at his own statement.

"Why would he have a wife? We're in highschool?" 

"You'd be surprised. Maybe he has a secret boyfriend or something, I've seen it both happen." He said before making his way to the exit, leaving Oikawa stewing with his thoughts.

"Secret boyfriend?"  
-  
A day passed since his conversation with Kunimi, and he couldn't stop thinking about Ushijima having a boyfriend.

Sure it was unlikely, but what if he was just really good at hiding it?

He grew a bit anxious, but nonetheless he still had butterflies every time he talked to Ushijima.

"There's a practice match with Karasuno tomorrow right?" Iwaizumi asked as Oikawa put on his normal clothes in the locker room.

"Yeah. Which reminds me, Shiratorizawa is gonna be there too, the coach wanted to see powerhouses play." Kindaichi informed the rest of the team, all eyes were Oikawa immediately.

He choked on his own saliva as he hurriedly put on his socks and shoes.

"Bye everyone!" He waved goodbye as the team stood there, laughing at the man's pure love.

"When do I fall in love like that?" Mattsun said, looking at Iwaizumi.

"Why are you looking at me?" 

"For reasons that should be obvious?" He said before making his way to the exit, leaving behind an oblivious Iwaizumi. 

"I swear, you're a fucking idiot sometimes." Makki said, chuckling as Iwaizumi chased after Mattsun.

-

The match was starting and yet Ushijima was nowhere to be found. Oikawa scanned the room for the man's eyes, and he couldn't find the pair of eyes he would get lost in.

Around the second set, Oikawa grew irritated. What if the man he loved was on a date with his significant other? Maybe that's why he isn't showing up? Whatever the reason, he grew intensly focused on the match.

He wanted to win it for Ushijima once again.

His world that was spinning for him froze when Karasuno took the last set.

He didn't win it for Ushijima.

It felt as if the universe was sending a sign, that Ushijima was not meant for him. And they weren't meant to be at all.

He sat down on the bench as he spotted a letter. He opened it and read it;

'Oikawa. This is Ushijima, I would like to meet later to confess something to you.  
Meet me at XXX"

He was frozen and shocked for a good minute before throwing the letter in the trash. It was probably some stupid prank anyway, added to the already bad day he was having.

After practice, he tossed and turned in his bed. He had a habit of taking a nap after his practices, and he desperately tried to fall asleep to forget about his love even for just an hour.

He got up, threw on his nearest pair of pants, grabbed an umbrella and ran towards the location that was in the letter.

He kept wondering whether or not he was wasting his time, but when he arrived he saw Ushijima standing in the middle of the field, looking as beautiful as ever all his worries washed away with the rain.

He walked up to him and let him in under his umbrella, part of him wondered why he was still here but he just didn't care anymore.

He was gonna get rejected wasn't he? 

Maybe he made it too obvious. Maybe all of of his efforts to conceal his feelings were unsuccessful. Maybe all this time, it was transparent.

Well he couldn't get rejected if he rejects first right?

"What's this about?" He said, he acted irritated.

Before Ushijima could say anything, he got to it first.

"You know.. I don't get you. You always follow me like a creep, and now you ask to meet up in the middle of a field?"

Why the fuck is he saying these things?

"I know it's weird but-"

Oikawa bared through it.

"No. I've had enough. You know, I just wanted to be nice to you, but this is too far for me. I don't like you, Ushijima. I never fucking will," Oikawa said as he glared at the man, "The farther you are away from me, the happier the man I'll be."

As he walked away, he felt guilt settle in nicely at the pit of his stomach. It hurt more than it would've to just get rejected. 

He stood behind some tall grass to make sure he's hidden as he watches Ushijima cry.

He felt so bad. He couldn't walk up to him after that could he?

He stayed hidden as his own tears slipped by his eyes. He watched as the man he loves, sobs. It's painful to watch him, cry, physically hurt himself and watch for the first time as he's seeing his lover's vulnerable sight.

He watches as he was comforted by Tendou, and ushered into his car.

His heart breaks at the sight.

He was fucking stupid.

The man did have feelings for him after all. And yet he blew it because of his own fucking insecurities.

He was gonna make it up to him. He didn't know how, but Oikawa was sure determined at least.


End file.
